Loxosceles

Yes, I did get used to walking in them. It takes time for your feet to get stronger - a few weeks. At the same time you learn how to place your feet for maximum comfort. Experiment and you will see.

I wear them everywhere, including hikes in the woods and walks around town. I wear them kayaking and gardening and shopping.

EVERYONE notices, and asks where I got them. Then I have to explain about VibramFiveFingers.com. I sound like a commercial.

After walking in the FiveFingers, I'm no longer afraid of going barefoot. Gravel on the driveway? Whatever. I just step carefully.

I have a greater appreciation of soft ground like dirt, moss, grass, and playground padding. Mmm.

The Flow is good in cold weather, but doesn't keep you dry. FiveFingers in the rain = waterlogged. I wonder if the R&D people are looking into gore-tex?

It seems I am drawn to weird footwear. High heeled sneakers, say - I've owned more than one pair. Saddle shoes. Dance shoes of all different kinds. And don't forget the shoes with wheels on the bottom, or knife edges on the bottom, for skating on various surfaces. I've even owned the Air Rift.

This one is even weirder than all of those. It even comes with a nutty ideology that, I suspect, is grounded in truth: your feet work fine without any shoes. Better, in fact.

So, here they are: shoes to walk barefoot in.



A recent New Yorker article entitled "You Walk Wrong" put words to a suspicion I've been having for a while: even though I "need" running shoes that correct my overpronating gait, there is probably nothing actually wrong with my feet.

Normal running shoes make my feet hurt in one way. Special shoes make my feet hurt less, but differently.

Yet, no matter how my feet hurt - whether after a run or a day in dress shoes - taking the shoes off always returns me to normal. If running shoes really corrected some problem with the way I naturally use my feet, wouldn't I feel better with the shoes and worse without?

The You Walk Wrong" article suggests that most people's barefoot stride is just fine, and supportive or extra-cushioned shoes might do more harm than good.

But enough about me. What about these shoes?

They're called the Vibram FiveFingers. They have a very thin but tough rubber sole, individual toes, and my version has some velcro closures to adjust the fit.

It's almost not right to call them shoes (the first time I stepped onto a gravel driveway was my wake-up call). Think of them like a strap-on callus for your bare feet.

In shoes, I (and, probably, you) slam my heel on the ground pretty hard. The heels of my shoes are always the first part to wear out. I took the Fivefingers for a trip to the store. On parking lots, sidewalks, and hard floors, my heels hurt.

But then, what about those times at Alfred when Amy and I took our shoes off and walked across campus? We avoided gravel driveways, for one thing. And when we got to a grassy field, I'd put my foot down to enjoy the feel of it. I did not put my foot down heel first.

In fact, when I step on unknown grass, or a kibble-strewn floor like the ones in my house, I step with the flat or the ball of my foot first. I land softly. Barefoot hikers call this fox walking.

Now, I have two problems. One is re-learning how to walk, since I drop into my heel-slamming habits whenever I'm outdoors. The other is strengthening the muscles in my feet. After a few hours in the Fivefingers, my arches and toes feel tired! This is normal in the beginning, they say.

Will I one day be able to run without running shoes? Hike without hiking boots? Here's hoping.

Halloween is coming up! We females have a wide range of costumes to choose from! Well, actually, a lot of costume catalogs sound like lists of words that really, really don't need to appear after "Sexy". For example...

• Sexy Ninja
• Sexy Gangster
• Sexy Construction Worker (gives new meaning to "cone bra")
• Sexy Taxi Driver
• Sexy Referee
• Sexy Librarian
• Sexy Border Crossing Guard
• Sexy Nun
• Sexy Insect
• Sexy Robin (yes, I do mean Batman's sidekick)
• Sexy Building
• Terrible pun alert: Sexy Firefighter, the "Fire Fox"
• ...and, of course, everyone's favorite, the Sexy Prostitute.

There's also a Beth costume but I don't think they got me right at all. "Beth’s costume features her big blonde wig, with a black dress and dark sunglasses. The costume also includes handcuffs, a necklace, and a knife with leg strap."

Best of all: Lydia the Tattooed Lady. I don't see that they remembered the ships on her hips though.

Since I'm an internet celebrity and all, I've decided to put my influence to the test: I am BRINGING BACK SADDLE SHOES. (Please don't ask "where did they go?".) This guy is also some sort of internet celebrity, and he singlehandedly got 14,000 people to start wearing saddle shoes. That means there are only about 6x10⁹ of you losers still holding out.

You don't want to be left out of the latest development in fashion and overall coolness, so of course you will purchase and obsessively wear a pair of saddle shoes. Got it? If you prefer to wear some other type of snazzy spectator-style shoe, that's fine too. Saddle shoes are unisex and appropriate for all ages, so nobody with feet has an excuse for not wearing them.


I got some saddles from Payless.com, but I don't recommend them. They're tight and stiff and made of cheap vinyl. Instead, try Muffy's, which has saddle shoes with red soles, white soles, black soles, rubber grippy soles, leather dancing soles, and even high heels. They've got brown-and-white, black-and-white, red-and-white, white-on-black, and some weird color combos involving browns and greys and beiges. You have no excuse, people.